Wednesday, May 21

When People say it's not really a Big Deal... It Actually Is.

my heart keeps pounding 
my mind keeps racing 
sitting here bouncing 
its a never ending battle 

some people think anxiety is a joke 
but mix it with changes in ones dopamine
you'll get a case of bad insomnia 
and writers block 

over-thinking 
over-analyzing 
over-rationalizing 
it's on an everyday basis 

but then theres a hint of impulsiveness 
jumping from one task to the next 
while getting distracted 
sometimes being a little impatient 
noticing all the small things around you 
noticing every gesture someone makes
hearing every conversation around you
just being aware of everything 
drive me fucking crazy 

I am never alone 
even when I am alone 
the funny thing is 
all my poetry is about being alone
physically and emotionally 
but then these fucking thoughts linger  

I just want a peace of fucking mind 
that steady heartbeat
without any worries in the world
yearning for real peace and quiet 

day dreaming 
when that day will come 
of being one with my soul 

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